-- the situation does something explicitly homoerotic
-- every time there is tension between ronnie and sammie
-- they mention how important Sunday night dinner is
-- every time deena uses a cute metaphor/analogy/catchphrase to cover up sluttiness
-- for the phrases "gym tan laundry," "MVP," and "t-shirt time"
-- every time snooki eats a pickle
-- snooki says "mraaaaah'
-- every time sammi threatens to leave the house
-- every time they wear a self referential tshirt (ie Ronnie's 'come at me bro' shirt)
-- pauly d says 'oh yeah'
-- one of the guys snooki / jwoww hooks up with has a girlfriend / fiance
-- someone says 'DTF' or 'smush'
-- every time deena talks about masturbating
-- every time there is actual physical violence
-- someone who does not live at the house shows up at the house unannounced
finish your drink:
-- if mike ever actually successfully scores with a girl
-- when anyone gets arrested
-- when someone actually leaves the house never to return
-- people in the house hook up with eachother (ronnie and sammi don't count)